One million years ago, noon last Sunday, five droids were given the chance of receiving immortality and supreme power over the universe. The droids, which were switched on simultaneously, were commanded to race each other to the age of one million years. One droid chose to position himself at the North Pole. Another droid chose to position himself beyond the orbit of the moon. A third droid chose to position himself outside the orbit of Pluto. The fourth droid chose to position himself outside the rim of the Milky Way galaxy. The fifth droid chose to position himself outside the local group, and at rest with respect to the frame defined by the Cosmic Background Radiation. The paper explains why the fifth droid won the contest, and why his victory falsifies all naked ape science since Galileo.
